Last night i had a nightmare again

I saw my bf with another woman. I couldnt breath and i found myself crying even after i woke up.

It’s the worst fear i have, in any relationship.

And i realize that. The previous one, when he walked out of my life, he took all my ability of trust.

I’m scared. That i’m just gonna break everything again, to make myself not vulnerable, to be in my lonely world again. 

Im really scared right now..